The week that could've been but might not have...
Lallu and Rabri heaved a collective sigh of relief when they were acquitted in the disproportionate assets case recently. Now then can keep their date with destiny and be the first ever space tourists from India. It'll cost them a modest $20 Million each but what the heck, they can afford it. Sources close to the power couple reveal that Lalluji has harboured a secret desire to go "uppar" from the time he was a young lad. And now that "Shooneeta Villyams" has made it to the space station, he feels his time has finally come. The twosome will now make their way to more frigid environs, in Russia, where they will be trained and launched. It is rumoured that Lallu wanted to take a bovine into space but the Russian Space Agency was quick to inform that the word was not cowsomonaut.
We wish him and Rabriji the very best. So do the IIMs.
George W signed a document the other day that ensured Manmohan Singh's acceptance into his nuclear family. As the concept of the nuclear family is slightly unclear to Mr. Singh, who has lived with a joint/extended family all his life, Mr. Bush took some time to explain the nitty gritty to his couterpart. " I have great respect for Mr. Singh and welcome him as a friend and a nanny.The truth is my daughters have gone wild and I've noticed that folks from the Punjab have a very firm reign on their kids. So from 10am to 6pm every day Mr.Singh will weild the whip that I've been too much of a wimp to hold and I can kick all that bad publicity goodbye. Who cares about the DAMN EYERAQ war. The next election is going to depend on how good my kids are. So once again, I'd like to thank Mr. Singh over in India." Uhhh...ok.
In other news they've finally locked up Manu Sharma and Navjot Singh Sidhu, after years of deliberation to figure out whether they were killers. We could've told them before the cases even began. Anyway, the ultimate revenge has been plotted by the families of the two victims. Sources from the CBI have revealed that the two unrepentant gentleman will be housed in the same cell for many years. Navjot will only be allowed to speak in Sidhu-isms that too non-stop, baring a few hours sleep and Manu will not be allowed to get a word in edgeways. To make up for this imbalance he will be provided a gun with a single bullet and no hope of a reload.
Closer to home, Father Christmas aka Santa Claus (No he isn't the latest addition to 50 Cent's posse) visited our office premises (photo above). There's a sneaky suspicion going around that he might not be the real thing. Perhaps the maniacal glint in his eye gave it away as he bounced around asking, "Where would like to be stabbed this Christmas?" had something to do with it. Thank goodness there aren't any children around. Badly done costumes are the stuff that fuel years of nightmares. And that mask. *Shudder*
So there is it, Friday Puree. Get it hot, get it cold, get it before it gets old.